2019, it’s been one heck of a ride! *Mic Drop*

30th Dec, 2019

Heh, Wakurugenzi Wakuu. M’merudi ama you’re still confusing people upcountry with your phones whose names rhyme with ‘za homie’ and ‘ni fiti’. M’meona ile meme ya yengz akijaribu kuwasha kuni alafu ako tu za, “Aki Shosh this thing is not wakaing!”? City people, you really make our days.
I really hope you have a good break even as it goes to a close and whew! But hii Krisi ilikuwa weird. On the eve mlikuwa mnatweet some heart breaking things. Sending hugs your way. Alafu on Krisi and Boxing Day, y’all had hot tea and the timeline was an actual mess! But it was so entertaining. I’m really hoping KoT are kinder and friendlier in the coming year coz y’all can be really out of order.
Anyway, ni nini imenileta hapa ata? Umm… oh, yeah. Eh, y’all know my two best buds (I swear they made me write that). Wafula and Sospeter? We were just chatting on the group. We were looking back on the year that was. We work together and basically spend every free moment together. So we experience the same things.
It hadn’t hit me how crazy 2019 was. Nilikuwa tu naona mashida but guys, there’s also so much good that came out of it. Here are a few faves that I think are worth keeping in our hearts – ni nini? That statement has you confused? We move regardless…
Valentines. Hahah, yaani Kenyan men mlianzisha an imaginary global event ndio mhepe watu wenu like the kings y’all are? LOOOOOL!!! You guys achieved what world peace couldn’t. But it was also somewhat a big blow to y’all’s faces because the yengs weren’t even moved. They just kept it moving and we were left looking like… it was just embarrassing if I’m being honest.
KCB M-PESA made y’all really happy. That thing we say that #KCBLovesYou haikuwangi kosokoso please. If you got an increased loan limit, lift your hand? Mngeona Sospeter. Alichukua loan akaenda kununua machuma za vidole. I will sit him down one day about responsible borrowing. Not to mean that I haven’t yet but I am no quitter. That explains a lot about why I’ve never given up on these clowns.
International Womens’ Day was a whole mood! Si I’m telling you the queens are winning and the boychild anaenda events haziko. We need to talk. Y’all remember this gem?Oooh and how can I not mention the sports. I attended 80% of the KCBae sports events with these two clowns! If you read my previous rally blogs especially, you’ll see how hawa watu hawaezi pelekwa mahali juu ya aibu ndogondogo. Which honestly really beats me. Sports events don’t require much of you in terms of decorum. We go for the elements, the action, the dust/mud and excitement. We scream, we cheer, we get sweaty and dirty. So HOW is it even possible, in such an environment, to choma and choma with your chests? The Witty Banker is THOROUGHLY confused. Mnaona mbona mi huchoka? It’s starting to make sense now, no?
Ooh, by the way congratulations to all the rally drivers starting with Baldy! Our Rugby and Football teams; and our Volleyball queens! You guys gave us a good year and y’all really showed out. I absolutely love to see it! Can’t wait to do it again in 2020!
2019 is also the year ule msee wa kuwika hapa chini Kencom made his debut. Whew and my! Have you seen the crowd he commands? A whole leader! You fave could never. We sure look to more hoarseness this coming year. This guy made our lunch hour so much more fun! Unaingia tu offisi walking and feeling like George Jefferson – a whole mood!
That’s also when we merged with NBK. Hey cousins! Ama that makes us siblings now? We’re not entirely sure how that works but we are beyond glad to be… umm…. Together? By the way… Naeza pata kiti huko? Maybe this is how I separate with these two clowns on days when I just cannot? Ama we take it offline? Anyone?
I can’t not talk about how you guys had us recording impressive profits for choosing us. I am not the bank’s spokesman or anything. But umm… I just really think you should know how much East Africa’s biggest bank loves you. I can see how I sound like a wingman but I promise this is not flattery. #KCBLovesYou.
I’ll end with this one because Wafula is a gone case. D’you guys know you guys had us named ‘The Most Attractive Bank’ in Cytonn’s Q3 banking sector survey? Y’all really did the thing! Sasa shida ni… Kueleza Wafula what that means. Mans went on a little walk to look at everyone🤦🤦🤦‍♀️🤦. See why I need a new place to sit? We truly appreciate the love!
Bonus? Mnakumbuka Mobile Matrix wakikuja kuitisha Kshs5 on #KCBLionsDen? They really had us in 1st half! Legends! 🙌🙌🙌
To another great year of partnering, working and engaging with each other. We really are relationship goals, huh? 😻
Let’s do it!
The Witty Banker!

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